I’m writing this through gritted teeth. I really have no interest at the minute in updating my blog so I’m forcing myself to do it. I’m not saying I’m winding it up, I just mean at present I don’t have much interest, so please excuse me if this filters through into my prose.
I’ve recently left London after a 16 week stint there. I picked London because frankly I got sick of travelling. I remember sitting on my balcony in Buenos Aires and realizing I couldn’t even be arsed to get the ferry on a day trip to see Uruguay. I had no desire to see another part of Argentina, or even see anything more of Buenos Aires. Furthermore, I realised that Buenos Aires wasn’t for me. First, Argentine women are timewasters. They don’t really enjoy men, they enjoy playing with them. It’s a zero-sum game: they gain nothing from it and simply destroy value. I’m not interested in them: I don’t like children who play with their food, I like ones who relish it. Second, the Argentines, the rest of them, are a bit weird. I really can see why BA has the highest concentration of psychologists per capita in the world. They are a little ‘hystericos’. Cross the hand-waving melodrama of the Italians with a Spanish IQ and South-American incompetence and you have a load of highly strung, idle and incompetent wops with eggshell-thin egos.
I realised that if I was going to stay and build a new life in South America, then I’d have to move country and start again. I knew I didn’t have it in me. I thought more about girls, and game, and Tom’s words haunted me, “you’ve had most of your success in London”. Was I running away? I worried I was.
The thought occured to me: perhaps a London stint would do me good. I could spend a lot of time with my family: my sister and my niece. I could meet friends and have an almost instantaneous social circle. And the daygame? It might have been more of a grind than Eastern Europe but it had produced results, and had less breakdowns. I’d give it another shot.
Life in London
London can be summarised as two matched pairs of pros and cons:
1) Friends vs Depravity
Through the Game network I found it easy to have a network of friends in London. I also, in moments of good vibe, stumbled across several ‘ins’ to new social circles. With family nearby then this box is firmly ticked.
The downside is the exposure to depravity. London drips with it on every street. Each day you are non-stop bombarded with faggotry, leftie-ism, immigrants, ethnics, impoliteness, drunkeness, squalor and horror. It is truly like living in the Judge Dredd comics’ Mega City One.
2) Culture vs Cost
There’s loads to do in London. With the tiniest of effort you can find something to do every night of the week. Hell, from meetup.com alone you can do something every single day of the month. The downside to this smorgasbord of cultural fodder is two-fold. First, the cost in financial terms. London’s damn expensive! My Unplugging budget of a grand a month was immediately doubled. Second, due to the fact that the average Londoner is now a harcore Marxist/Feminist then when interacting you have to constantly bite your tongue. Go to an innocuous sounding ‘Evening on Modern Architecture’ and you can guarantee that within minutes a pompous Guardian reader will have found a way to talk about ‘fairness’.
Ok ok so we get to the money shot, this is what you all want to know anyway. I’m now going to give you the brutally honest lowdown.
- In 16 weeks I managed to do about 300 sets of daygame. And this is being able to, if I wished, essentially daygame full time.
- From those 300 sets I fucked one girl, a very hot Brazilian 27yo tourist, whom I enjoyed a mini-break in Amsterdam with.
- I had two very near-misses with teenagers. One, where I almost SDL’ed a 19year old, who was one of the hottest girls I’ve seen in my life. The second, where I interfered with an 18yo German au pair in my room, got a hand-job onto Tom’s rug and only didn’t bang her because she refused to fuck with her cunt full of womb-jam.
- Aside from this, I had 2 further dates and a couple of i-dates. I probably got in total around 15 numbers, three of which were “suspicious On” girls who I thought I’d have a high chance of banging if I could get them out. Unfortunately they all were manically busy and about to leave London, and I got none of them out. The two other dates were with timewasters.
I’m not sure if the above results are disappointing or not. My heart feels like they are, however my head tells me they really aren’t that bad. Most daygamers don’t fuck anybody. Let that sink in: most daygamers do not fuck anybody from daygame. Most 40 year old men don’t fuck anybody. I fucked a stunning girl and almost cranked two teenagers. Compared to the celebrity daygamer these results are poor, but most of those daygamers aren’t in London.
There’s a real danger here to forget what the dating options for the normal 40 year old single man are, and let me tell you, they are virtually zero. Most 40 year old men seem to do one of these:
- live miserable lives with fat, nagging wives
- date loathsome tranny-like 35+ women scraped from the barrel of months of soul-destroying rejection on online dating
- withdraw from the marketplace, enjoy their life and stack paper, then bang whores or semi-whores on bi-yearly trips Eastwards
- The exception being the odd one with either a happy marriage or who’s got his shit together and is running some kind of ecosystem (e.g. dance teacher, DJ) and getting some results
I talked to a friend a week ago. He’s 42 and married, with three children. When I told him I’d banged one hot 27 year old Brazilian in three months he dropped his fork. “Christ!” he said, “I’ll have to start doing daygame!”.
Nevertheless… for me, my results feel disappointing. If I’d banged all three, then I’d be happy; but for just one, it feels like too much effort for too little return.
The Cost of Daygame
My London time really showed me that Daygame in London, for me, has a high cost associated with it. In the 16 weeks in London I suffered an emotional rollercoaster of ups and downs. Three whole weeks were lost to depressive attacks and recovery. Some days I was hyper, the others I achieved nothing. In a recent podcast I recorded with Krauser we discuss this phenomena (don’t know if he’s released it yet). Daygame is taxing and it drains you. All hardcore daygamers know this and they structure their lives around it. Don’t expect to achieve much of anything else if you’re doing a lot of daygame.
For me, my threshold for daygame is very low. I found that when increasing the amount I did per week I simply reached this threshold faster. It would become a chore, and I’d become insincere. It was revelatory to look at my approach stats from the experience and see that despite wanting to “get stuck into daygame” I’d achieved what amounted to basically one very big day of daygame per week. In fact, if I did it again then that’s exactly what I’d do. I’d do ONE big day, starting very early, of 20 sets, then 6 days to recover.
Daygame in London is not pleasant. London itself saps one’s vibe. Walking on the streets it’s hard to find any calm: your senses are constantly bombarded and you’re jostled and hassled. In my opinion reactions in London are far poorer than they were 2 years ago. More eye rolls, more rudeness and much less interest. The only sets that get any traction are usually with foreign girls who are either tourists or FOB. Again, this is for ME, and maybe you feel very differently. Two years ago I was stumbling on an English Yes-girl every 1-200 sets who was easy to get on a date and who liked me. This time round this metric seems to have completely disappeared. The cause? I don’t know, but I suspect London has been over-gamed due to the army of men getting into daygame. I also believe that non-obese women’s SMV in the UK is increasing year by year and is measurably higher than two years ago. Other PUAs report that far more girls are in relationships than in the past: a sign of women having great buying power. In my opinion daygame in London has now degenerated into one simple thing: hunt the foreigner. The only time anybody I know gets results is with non-English girls who are tourists, or FOB (Fresh Off the Boat) and looking for adventure sex. Either that or they’re under 35 and really good looking.
The real cost of daygame is in how it affects your life, and I found that in London it absolutely wrecked it. I got literally nothing of any consequence done in those sixteen weeks. Almost no work on my business, almost no gym time. Ontop of this the constant low level stress of daygame I am sure worsened my depression.
I contrast this to the daygame I did in Buenos Aires, and the cost of that was zero. I was working extremely hard on a full time course, doing homework each evening and had no time for daygame but to rush out each lunchtime and do thirty minutes. Given how much the course and business had added structure to my life and removed any of the spare time which is neccessary to build up depression, I was highly energized. The city wasn’t vibe-sapping, rather the opposite, and there were plenty of targets who, although ultimately disinterested, gave good reactions. It was easy as pie to run out and do a quick five sets, with absolutely no cost at all. In fact, the daygame resulted in a productivity gain.
The first conclusion is this: Daygame, for me, in London… for me… is not worth it.
As I discussed in a recent podcast with Krauser I was horrified to sit back and see how little in the rest of my life I’d achieved during those 16 weeks. I’d done almost zero work on my mysterious business. I’d barely attended the gym. Nothing! Furthermore, during that period I was afflicted by my old enemy, depression and lost probably 2-3 weeks from it. Daygame for me, in those circumstances, causes a lot stress, anxiety and mood swings. By the end of 16 weeks I was burned out and ready to leave. It isn’t a maintainable long-term strategy.
I look back at the lovely girl I met and think “was it worth it?”. Well, the answer is yes. I’m living now having had the night-terrors of the sexual scrapheap kept at bay. I’m glad I did it, but I don’t want to do it again. Sixteen weeks of my life now would be better filled with productivity, stability, happiness and hobbies rather than sixteen weeks of instability, nothingness and a shag. What is this? Is it maturity? It is giving up? To some I imagine it’s game heresy. You are not allowed to admit there’s a point where it’s not worth it. Everything’s possible. It’s just mindset. It’s just limiting beliefs. Well… I can see why people get fanatical like that: basically the road ahead is so hard that nothing but fanaticism gets you through it. However, I think after you’ve done a shitload of game, and you’ve done a few thousand approaches then you earn the right to look at it with some skepticism and objectivity.
It isn’t even a question of sixteen weeks of not getting laid. For those results I believe there are better options than daygame. Not online dating, of course not… don’t be silly. Not bargame. But dance-class game. Yes, I attended some dance classes during my time in London and with my keen game eye for social dynamics my educated guess would be that if I’d gone to dance class three times a week, networked, carefully socialized, built my circles, worked the crowd, waited, made my move… then there’d be a good chance I could have got a girl of equal quality through dance class in a similar time frame.
I won’t live in London again. The cost is too high and the depravity affects me. The results from game are probably worse than I could find abroad. Investing time in building a life in London is futile.
I’m doing some much needed work on my little business, then I’m jetting off for another winter in South America. I plan on visiting two different countries, a city in each, and continuing my research for my permanent ‘Winter Location’. Somewhere I can, hopefully for many years to come, live for the winter period and build up a social network, English-teaching work, contacts, girls, etc. I also drastically need to lose 30-40 lbs in weight, as this will improve my lot next year during the summer season.
I’ll return next February or March, probably spend a few weeks in Newcastle, then look to move to my ‘Summer City’ in Eastern Europe. I don’t think hopping from city to city, living the Laptop Lifestyle life with few friends and trying to do ‘hit n run’ daygame will work for me. I’ll probably look to build a life somewhere and get an English teaching job. Maybe.