Step by Step: The American Tourist (part Two) ¹

Continuing from Part One…

We leave and walk up the road. I again force her to walk behind me but of course with a smirk and a half-jokey manner. Then I then offer her my arm. She links it. Compliance test passed. I now know exactly where I am in the Pick Up. I have a girl who is available, probably wants a sport-fuck and likes me. It’s mine to take and to take it I have to escalate. I am minutes away from Venue Two and as soon as we’re in there and sat down I will begin the escalation process with The Questions Game.

Venue Two

Venue Two is a pub five minutes walk up the road. I sit us at *adjacent* high stools at a small table and get in a couple of alcoholic drinks. She’s drinking freely, so this is great. I happily get in a couple of drinks. She asks for rum and cock coke so of course when I’m out of sight at the bar I order her a double. In hindsight I’d now say this:

When you have a girl on a date that wants to drink then indulge her. Do a few shooters. It’s all about her self-corroding her own LMR with alcohol and simultaneously giving herself plausible deniability.

I start with simple stuff, asking her about her childhood: her most embarrassing moments. Asking her if she was close to her father. Her eyes sparkle. She loves rapport questions. She likes the game and asks me things I’d hoped for. I tell a side-splitting true story about accidentally shitting myself in a swimming pool age 9. Truly. I love telling this story and even though it’s extremely disgusting girls never fail to laugh at it and I… er.. suppose it shows honesty. I also think at some deeper level it shows them you know they are normal squalid humans who eat, shit and piss and like to fuck just like everyone else. I’ve actually told hot girls on dates before “don’t worry, even though losers put you on a pedestal I know you shit and piss and fart just like everyone else”. I ask her about her past boyfriend. We banter a bit. The questions become more overtly about attraction and sex. I ask her when she last kissed someone. I ask when her last boyfriend was. I ask when she last had sex. She’s got very sparkly eyes now and despite sitting down is kind of lolling round on her stool. Good sign. She wants to be escalated.

Around this time I go for a piss and when I come back the three faux east-end wideboys (hipsters in disguise) who were playing darts are clustering near her trying to run their patter. I size them up and immediately make the decision I’ll use extreme violence on them if they try fuck with me. They’re small and look like fronters and I’m starting to feel like this girl is maybe just waiting for me to fuck her. I walk up and look at them without saying a word. They turn around and leave immediately. I guess I subcommunicated notch-protection violence.

I decide to Make My Move. I like to make it official. I like to crystallize the move-making into a single point in time. It helps stop you weaseling and coming up with bullshit like “the right moment never happened”. You have to make the moment. I have a little system for doing this. It’s simply a set of three questions in succession with greater and greater overt intent shown. Plus I run through a set of physical compliance tests. If the physical compliance goes ok and the questions go ok then I simply say some cheesy shit like “I have a question… have you realised yet that we’re going to kiss?” then grab her and pull her in. It really doesn’t need anything super-suave. It can be clumsy and cheesy. The important things are:

you do it
you are unreactive if she rebuffs it
you try again, up to five more times at least

I’m serious. A good frame to go on a date with is to know that you will try to snog the girl at least six times. This may seem quite shocking to some but if you want to be *that guy* then you need to cast away the chode comfort provider shit and start forcing yourself to move towards being more of a tough, cool guy player. Players kiss and fuck girls on first dates.

I say the cheesy crap and pull her in for a kiss. She’s standing up at this point and I’m sitting on a stool and she just literally flops completely against me, her entire body pressing into me and we kiss. This is good. This is Tom Torero’s “Floppy Test” passed with flying colours. She’s a good kisser and it’s quite sexual. I pull her hair a bit. I remember to break away first then she turns round on the spot and wiggles inbetween my legs (I’m sitting on a stool remember) and lies her back against me and gathers my arms and puts them round her. This is super-good. This is a really sexual, submissive position that she’s just put herself into. She absolutely wants to fuck.

I decide this girl is ripe for fucking and I need to extract. Again, nowadays I’d just seed some movie bullshit and go straight to a taxi but at this point I decided I still needed a Venue Three. I’m suggesting we go to the Hawley Arms, Amy Winehouse’s old local, and her phone beeps. It’s the myserious friend, and guess where she is… The Hawley Arms. FUCK! I’m horrified but hide it. We leave and walk up the road.

As we reach the pub I’ve decided that I must acknowledge the flighty nature of my target and the ability of girls to cockblock each other. My deepest fear is not losing the notch but getting tooled for an evening then losing the notch. I draw my internal boundary in the sand then outside the pub I stop her, look at her, smile and say: “Look. I’m enjoying spending time with you and it would be cool to meet your friend, maybe have one drink so you guys can catch up, but I’m talking like twenty minutes. I have to let you know: I have no intent sitting watching you and your friend talk all evening. This is about you and me now, not you and her. Got it?”. It’s not done pompously, but with a smile and a look of authenticity. She listens, digests, nods then says “ok”.

We go in and sit on a bench. I get drinks. I have my arm round her and am telling silly stories. She’s playing with my fingers and I’m playing with her hair. Suddenly her friend appears from upstairs. She says ‘hi’, takes one look at us and excuses herself and disappears back upstairs, apparently to sit on her own. I’m amazed. The girl-coding must have said “I’m going to fuck this guy, do not cockblock”. Later on I have a piss and am amazed to see it’s true, the friend is sitting upstairs in the corner, alone, watching something on her ipad.

I’ve already seeded something about my house to my target so I pull the trigger and suggest we leave. She agrees. Then she says she needs the loo so off she goes. Five minutes pass. Then ten. Then fifteen. This is odd. To my horror I wonder if in fact for some weird reason she’s run off. The thought chills me. My notch! But it wouldn’t suprise me. Really, after a few years in game nothing about the rudeness of women’s behaviour suprises me. I check the rest of the pub. I look outside. I go upstairs thinking maybe she’s sneakily joined her friend but the friend is still alone. I check with the friend: nope she hasn’t seen her. Then just for lulz I Facebook-close the friend as she’s quite hot with big tits and is new to London. I go downstairs. Twenty minutes have now passed. I try calling but no answer. I’m in two minds whether to just go home. Twenty five minutes. By this point I’m sure she’s run off. I’m shocked and enraged. I go downstairs and just push open the door to the ladies and look in. There she is, standing there in the middle of the ladies with a dappy, distracted look on her face and photographing the ceiling. She giggles. “I thought you’d fucking died or something” I say. “Oh yeah sorry… I got distracted. This toilet is awesome!”. Jesus. The toilet is awesome? I swallow my rage and we leave. This was Derailment. Classic Derailment: retarded shit girls do at the last minute to fuck it up and stop themselves getting fucked.

During the taxi ride I keep her talking about her plans for next week to keep her mind out of the present. We get to my house. It’s a big, weird place, so I give her the mini-tour and she thinks it’s cool. We head to my room.

At this point I haven’t got any concept of ‘Bedroom Escalation’ so it’s all very clumsy and with a girl less eager to fuck I could have still lost the lay. All I do is after taking our shoes off show her some of my pictures then try to grab her. She skips out of the way and stands, literally, stands on my bed looking at the pictures and burbling on about them. She’s staying out of my way but isn’t leaving. Of course now I’ve read Nick’s book and had him explain his part of the model so I’d do things differently now. All she wanted was for the final stages of the seduction to be done correctly and smoothly. Far better would have been to even do something cheesy and simple: shoes off then sit together on a beanbag and watch some silly cartoons for five minutes until she feels comfortable enough to nuzzle in. That’s it. However at this point I didn’t know so I bludgen it. I jump on the bed and grab her. We kiss. I push her down. We’re making out. I pull out her perfect tits and start sucking them. She’s moaning then asking me to turn out the lights. I comply. I stick it in. +1.

Afterwards there’s a palbable sense of relief. She got her rebound holiday-fuck and I got my lay. We lie there, sweaty and chatting. She’s got a fabulous body: petite, curvy, very firm and with a ripped stomach, bubble-butt and firm, perky tits. I tell her so and she’s ecstatic. She’s delighted to let me photograph her tits for posterity. Nice aren’t they?